Freud and Women

Although it is clear that Freud hardly touched on the issue of women in his writing, his essays seem to explain out why some women repeatedly tolerate abuse from their partners.

First, let us consider the Electra Complex, wherein sexually desires her father and, therefore, associates with her mother (this is analogous to the Oedipus Complex existing in males). It has been proven that move women who are abused were raised in houses with an abusive father. In the formative years, then, the abused girl's ideal man is one who abuses women, perhaps herself included. It follows, then, that once the woman reaches sexual maturity her concept of ideal men remains twisted, and she is attracted to the bad boy, the man who seems disinterested, overbearing, perhaps an alcoholic, and all other characteristics that might remind her of her father--of course, she seeks these characteristics unconsciously.

Second, this behavior may also be further explained in Freud's essay, "Beyond the Pleasure Principle." In this essay Freud argues that the pleasure principle does not explain all behaviors. Not all behaviors are for pleasure, as he explains. In his example, a child who is extremely attached to his mother plays games in which he throws his toys to make them "disappear." He plays this game not because he gets pleasure out of making the object disappear, but because making the objects disappear gives him control over the situation of his mother's leaving him daily. It is clear that battered women do not stay with abused men for pleasure--after all, what pleasure could a woman get out of being abused? But it has been argued that women have control over whether to stay with a man or to leave him after she has been beaten, and perhaps that moment after a fight when the man apologizes and begs her to stay does provide her with a sense of control over the situation.

Of course, there is more to be said about this than Freud mentioned in his works. Psychological manipulation, for example, is always involved in abuse. False promises for change, existing love, and drug addictions are other factors that are involved. Nevertheless, Freud seems to suggest one logical conclusion: the best way to prevent domestic abuse is in stopping child abuse. Only then can we break this dangerous and deadly cycle.